This essay....I feel seen. I, too, struggle with numerous mental health issues. Currently having quite an especially rough go of it. And yet....and YET, I, too love picking out what I will wear each day, using the naked canvas of my washed face to slowly put on potions and lotions and powders, define my brows, lips, high cheek bones. I am 60 and this still gives me such pleasure, it's impossible to describe. So you did it for me, Esme. As our beautiful and missed, bell, did, too. I have actually told my husband that when I stop doing THAT, that is when he'll know I've given up. At my age, is it still vanity? Some, yes, it is. But it's also about this deep, private pleasure that I still feel each morning in front of my mirror. And, yes, the magnification of the mirror has increased with my age. But I am truly grateful for this pleasure. It's mine, all mine. At the tips of my fingers. And to read this this morning? I couldn't have woken up to read anything better. Huge love to you and your beloved, Esme...xo
I relate to so much here. Not skilled with make-up (or hail for that matter, lol) but I love, love, love beautiful clothes--the cashmere sweater in raspberry, a silk brown and lavender floral dress, a heavy tapestry cape with a single fabric covered button at the top-- they matter to me. Pieces that make me feel like more of who I am when I wear them. I appreciate the reminder that there's value in that.
So lovely! I have allodynia, so soft fabrics are a must. Often, that means silk and cashmere and satin alongside synthetic fluff and sherpa. I always write more (and better) when I’m draped in something that makes me feel pretty, when I know my hair looks good, when my cheeks are flushed and my eyebrows are just so. I sit up straighter. So I started working on cute pajamas and softie clothes for can’t-get-out-of-bed day. There’s a quiet confidence in loving your clothes at home, where you aren’t being seen.
This essay....I feel seen. I, too, struggle with numerous mental health issues. Currently having quite an especially rough go of it. And yet....and YET, I, too love picking out what I will wear each day, using the naked canvas of my washed face to slowly put on potions and lotions and powders, define my brows, lips, high cheek bones. I am 60 and this still gives me such pleasure, it's impossible to describe. So you did it for me, Esme. As our beautiful and missed, bell, did, too. I have actually told my husband that when I stop doing THAT, that is when he'll know I've given up. At my age, is it still vanity? Some, yes, it is. But it's also about this deep, private pleasure that I still feel each morning in front of my mirror. And, yes, the magnification of the mirror has increased with my age. But I am truly grateful for this pleasure. It's mine, all mine. At the tips of my fingers. And to read this this morning? I couldn't have woken up to read anything better. Huge love to you and your beloved, Esme...xo
I relate to so much here. Not skilled with make-up (or hail for that matter, lol) but I love, love, love beautiful clothes--the cashmere sweater in raspberry, a silk brown and lavender floral dress, a heavy tapestry cape with a single fabric covered button at the top-- they matter to me. Pieces that make me feel like more of who I am when I wear them. I appreciate the reminder that there's value in that.
So lovely! I have allodynia, so soft fabrics are a must. Often, that means silk and cashmere and satin alongside synthetic fluff and sherpa. I always write more (and better) when I’m draped in something that makes me feel pretty, when I know my hair looks good, when my cheeks are flushed and my eyebrows are just so. I sit up straighter. So I started working on cute pajamas and softie clothes for can’t-get-out-of-bed day. There’s a quiet confidence in loving your clothes at home, where you aren’t being seen.
I’m such a huge fan of your work and am honored that you shared my writing 🩷🩷
honored to have my work shared along with John Warners! his essay on upmarket fiction changed the way i relate to literature 🖤
I love silk everything!! I don’t have a Taurus moon, but a Taurus descendent and it’s very similar. 🥰